Thursday, March 08, 2007

Thoughts Of The Day...

so.. finally i got my offer letter from this australian university this morning. i cant think much of it right now magar i dont know why im so much more content lately. ultimately i think it has been the removal of stressors. i've never been happier to just be me, and be me for myself.

i dont know much of material things but somethings are for sure that i have always wanted from my life and studying to my highest hunger and to gain resources on my own is one of the majors. nothing i want more than to operate my scoliosis. ek chota sa ghar aur.. living a life with so much pride is all i have always craved for, always dreamt up.


i dont know where this leads, all i know is i have a life to be hopeful for. :)
eyes to see the colors in you, ears to listen to you, to breath your words, hands to touch your hands. to feel you all over again.
to be alone all over again.


:)
_____________
ah, nah one more thing
let me make this more clear today:

Delete everything.
Delete my name.
Delete my face.
Delete my contact number.

its not like you ever used them FOR ME anyways.
So, stop spying me here.
IDHER MUT AAYA KARO YOU DUMB***!!
dont look my flickrs, dont check these new shades of lipsticks on my face.
i dont want you to praise the beauty or like my haircut.
i dont want you to stay around as if im supernatural.
i hate you all! i rather give a fc..... no i won't.
i so have other things of note.



bhaar mei jao, aisa karo marr jao!! :D
haha nahe sachi.. FCUK OFF!
chor diya tou chor dou na ..
khatum bas!!

0 lend me some sugar.

 
written by jia.

  ..so lately i have been in this stay-up-till 7am, ungrammatical, nostalgic, talk to myself. paranoid, insomniac, wide eyed, and a little intense. okie maybe little is an understatement. wish i knew if i wanted stability more than the complete range of emotions and melodrama. if only life could be summarized in one simple word...good or bad. -im too young to be stuck somewhere in the middle, sitting on a fence and whining about it. no, i cant write an intro for myself, hence i ask you to read the damn blog. maybe.. you'll find out more through my posts. n in the meanwhile take a panadol handy.. .

tell me you luv me..

Terror Alert Level -

Terror Alert Level

dynasty -

One crow sorrow
Two crows mirth
Three crows a joining
Four crows a birth
Five crows lucky
Six crows cold
Seven crows a secret
Never to be told

mantra -
 

- Lately...

 When I was a child
a story was told
about the devil
and a girl so bold.
He offered her riches,
a fortune of gold,
and lovers abound.
But she lifted her soul,
she lifted her soul clean.
Like the story was told
on a dark country road
the same man appeared to me...

But I reached, I reached
through the rain to the Devil's feet.

Now twenty years later
to the place I return where I scorned the angels
for a passion that burned.
There set in a tree
a knot twisted and turned,
the face of a creature Hell bound.
So long ago
could my mind've played jokes on me?
As darkness sets in,
unavoidable sin,
the truth I try not to believe....

That I reached, I reached
through the rain to the Devil's feet.

-by Azure Ray

 

ode to meaning..

_________________

One Tree Hill - New Zealand.
Dedicated to Xulfee Bhai, who chose to die in the Summer of 2003 Oct 7.

calm before the storm

_________________

Numb by Linkin Park

And i know
I may end up failing too
But i know
You were just like me with someone disappointed in you..
I've become so Numb...I can't feel you there.

moon phase
 

calculated distractions

broken promises ..

said he: tum jaisay doosron say bhaagti ho aur chupati ho .. wohi mere saath bhi kiya....  "  

~*~  current mood ...

                 

coffee files...

'someone once said...

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